I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me. Woody Allen I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown. Woody Allen It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more. Woody Allen More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly. Woody Allen The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. Woody Allen What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. Woody Allen You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred. Woody Allen